Complaint Mania!

I believe that we make an effort, conscious or not, to get used to things that surround us. We quickly grow accustomed to what’s good, but we also tend to be in good terms with  what’s not so good, maybe in a slower pace though. However, I guess that there are things that no matter how hard we try, it’s just impossible to accept.

For me, one of these things is the low quality of customer service that companies provide. Maybe this is a skill especially well developed by us Brazilians, but I’m pretty convinced that it’s a worldwide phenomenon.

It doesn’t happen when you’re trying to buy something from a company. No, salespeople are generally experts in treating you well. The true façade of customer service emerges when the first problem arises. Salespeople have a clear objective in mind, which is to sell, of course. Support staff also have clear goals, but I’m convinced that the main objective is something like this: ‘how can I get rid of this bore as soon as possible?’.

Some examples:

Situation 1: “Sir, I need a copy of your ID to complete the service”

The following day: “Sir, now I need a copy of your driver’s license too.”

Question: “Why didn’t you say so yesterday?”

Answer given: “The directions are on the website”

Real answer (not given): “I didn’t check all the documentation. When I realised the ID was missing, this alone was enough to get rid of you. I really wanted to catch up on my Facebook banter”

Situation 2: “Sir, I can’t help you because the system is out”

Your reply: “Do you need the system to check if the settings on my new tablet are correct?”

Their reply: “I have to check if you’re really our client”

Your reply: “The chip has the name of your company”

Fake reply: “Sorry, sir. There’s nothing I can do.”

Real answer (not given): “Sir, please do understand me. When the system is out, I have the perfect excuse to be staring at the ceiling watching the minutes go by. I really want to go home. And you must agree, staring at the ceiling is much more interesting than trying to solve your problem”

Unfortunately, I’ve come across the solution that works most of the times. I say ‘unfortunately’, because the options are: 1) be rude; 2) speak loudly; 3) rage. Please notice that you can use them all together.

The consequences of an explosive attitude change the outcome, but not the philosophy. The difference now is that they finally realise that you won’t leave without a solution, which therefore means that the quickest way of getting rid of you is by actually solving your problem. Abracadabra!

It’s a sad conclusion I come to. Firstly, because I guess I’m not a huge fan of being mean to people, and neither are most people I know. Secondly, because it does me no good, on the contrary, I could go without the extra stress and frantic heartbeats. It also goes against my own personality of avoiding conflicts.

So now I’ve been trying to develop the skill of becoming a monster in a few seconds, and going back to my normal self right after, without actually triggering any physical or psychological side effects. The saddest part is that it’s working.

'Macarronic English'

Last week, I had quite a laugh when I saw this commercial.

If you don’t remember Joel Santana, he was South Africa’s coach during the last world cup. It was then that he became famous for two things: the amazing results he managed to achieve with his team, and his spectacular comments in a language that had some similarities with English. Check one of his interviews below.

I couldn’t help myself and posted the commercial on my Fan Page. But let me say something about this phenomenon I like calling “Macarronic English”, something that is a mix of English, the speaker’s first language and whatever comes to one’s mind at the moment of speaking.

I usually tell my students, especially those at the beginning stages, that it is preferable to speak something that sounds like English, than speaking Portuguese (my students’ first language) in class. The more outgoing ones really go for it, producing very interesting language, whereas others need to be sure that what they’re going to say is absolutely correct before they open their mouths.

The discussion between accuracy x fluency in the classroom is not a new one. And trying to come to a verdict of which is more important is a rather difficult, if not impossible matter, given all the circumstances, contexts and perspectives that must be taken into account.

However, I dare say that, generally speaking, I prefer to see my students attempting, taking risks and pushing themselves to produce language, than to have 100% correct but limited language production in class. I have one simple reason for that, which is that the main objective of any language is to enable its users to communicate. It doesn’t mean that I don’t mind whether my students speak correctly or not, far from it! What I’m saying is let’s try to get the message across first, and then we’ll worry about how it comes out. Simple as that!

For this reason, I’d say hats off to Mr. Joel Santana for communicating (or trying to). “See you guys mais tarde”!

A Confession

As a teacher, I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve told my students that making mistakes are  part of learning, and that errors are intrinsically linked with learning. Errors show that students are taking risks, and it is no cliché to say that you can learn a lot from your own mistakes.

The reason why I’ve chosen this topic is to confess to a ridiculously silly and yet revolting mistake I’ve made today.

Here at C.E.O., we’re preparing for a big event tomorrow, an opening cocktail for friends, partners and potential as well as already enrolled students. I had an idea to promote the event that included sending some companies a few cookies and teabags inside a box, along with a printed invitation that said something like this: “In Britain, people have tea at five; in America, every time is a good time for a cookie; and here at C.E.O. the cocktail is tomorrow, at 6p.m..” The idea was that the delicious homemade cookies we ordered would create some buzz in the offices, and the teabags would give a nice touch.

The response was really good, and I was quite pleased with myself. As I was going down the lift on my way to grab a quick snack, I realised that I had written ‘oppening’. Yes, with 2 ‘P’s. “Jesus, Mary and Joseph”, I said to my pale reflection in the mirror.

I immediately pictured myself living in a distant country with a different name, hiding from anyone I’ve ever met. Please, do pardon my exaggeration, but you must agree that this is not the best way to start a new English school.

I thought the best idea would be to ignore it, and mention it only in case someone brought it up. But then I remembered how my day started. To put it shortly, my exact words were: “Thank you for your email. I’m not too worried about the mistakes you’ve made in not delivering the products, I’m more worried about what you’re going to do about it, now that you’ve realised that there is a problem”. Man, if I had only known I’d be repeating these words in this situation.

So I thought to myself: “ignoring the mistake is not really the option that leaves me with a clear conscience”. So here I am, talking about this slip that made my guts twist a few minutes ago. And quoting myself, “I guess that confessing to my mistake is a much better way of dealing with it than hoping no-one will notice”.

I know some day I’ll probably laugh about it. But definitely today is way too soon for that.

Ps. I just hope I haven’t made any other slips while writing this post :/

Nota: algumas pessoas me perguntaram por que eu não estava escrevendo o blog em Inglês, já que a C.E.O. se propõe a ensinar a língua. Escolhi escrever em Português pensando nos meus alunos que estão no início do aprendizado. Porém, me deixei vencer pelo argumento de que posso contribuir mais um pouco no aprendizado dos alunos, em qualquer nível, se fizer os posts ‘in English’. Se você não concorda, por favor mande sua opinião.

An offer you can't refuse

Vamos começar falando sobre Business, e como o primeiro post no assunto, vou contar um pouco sobre como a C.E.O. começou.

Meu nome é Luciano Lapa, tenho 30 (quase 31) anos, nasci em Brasília, mas cresci e fui criado em Recife. Sou formado em Administração pela FCAP-UPE, certificado para o ensino de Inglês como segunda língua pela universidade de Cambridge, Inglaterra, e atualmente fazendo minha graduação no mesmo tema, pela mesma universidade.

Dei aulas de Inglês pela primeira vez em 2001, e muitas águas rolaram até chegar aqui. Me formei, morei um tempo em Glasgow, Escócia, depois em Barcelona, Espanha, voltei para o Brasil, morando em São Paulo por 5 anos.

Quando voltei para Recife em 2009, a carreira de professor de Inglês tomou novo fôlego. Não demorou muito para perceber que tinha reencontrado minha paixão. Não demorou muito tempo também para perceber que eu tinha grandes planos para minha velha/nova carreira.

Fui estudando, me qualificando, trabalhando muito, e fermentando muitas ideias. Um dia, numa conversa informal com minha grande amiga e sócia, Juliana, falei que abriria um curso de Inglês voltado para Negócios por três razões óbvias: a demanda é grande, não conheço ninguém que faça esse trabalho tão direcionado em Recife, e porque iria me divertir muito trabalhando com minhas paixões: Inglês, ensino e administração. Resultado: uma semana depois ela me ligou dizendo que não parava de pensar na ideia e que queria ser minha sócia. Disse que ia pensar no assunto. Desliguei o telefone, pensei comigo: pensar em quê? Liguei de volta e disse que o negócio estava fechado.

Isso foi em fevereiro desse ano, 2013. Estamos no final de julho e está tudo praticamente pronto: alunos chegando, aulas acontecendo, e muitas empresas interessadas. Não sei como tudo pode ter andado tão rápido.

Montamos um curso nos padrões que o público exige: num local muito bacana, com uma sala que ficou linda (sem querer ser ‘pai’ coruja) e tudo o que temos direito.

Tudo remete a Business, mas também fizemos questão de oferecer um espaço muito descontraído. Acredito que as chances de aprender uma língua aumentam bastante quando há diversão. Nossa regra é dar um tratamento pessoal para cada aluno e parceiro. Uma empresa é um conceito subjetivo, pessoas são reais, e queremos tratar pessoas como pessoas, por pessoas.

A filosofia é simples, surfando na inteligência do Bill Gates, que diz: “make the customers an offer they can’t refuse” (ofereça aos consumidores uma oferta que eles não podem recusar). E é exatamente isso que oferecemos: conveniência, flexibilidade para montar seu curso de acordo com o que você espera, pessoal qualificado, espaço voltado para o aprendizado, muito conforto, e o melhor, por um precinho mais do que justo e com muitas maneiras de ganhar descontos. 

É o famoso bom, bonito e barato. Se você tem vontade de estudar Inglês, vai ficar difícil encontrar um motivo para não ser aluno C.E.O.

ps.: a proposta é realmente excelente, mas não se preocupe porque não usamos do 'poder de convencimento' do Don Corleone, só para deixar claro! "Arrivederci"!

Greetings

Bem-vindo(a) ao blog da C.E.O. Corporate English Office. É com muito prazer e entusiasmo que tocamos a C.E.O., e é com o mesmo espírito e energia que começamos esse espaço.

A proposta do Blog é simples de entender, e segue basicamente o que a empresa oferece: Business + English + Teaching. É com isso em mente que pretendo abordar temas referentes ao mundo dos negócios, da língua inglesa e ensino/aprendizado de uma língua.

Essa ideia veio maturando com o tempo, pois acredito que um compromisso surge com a criação de um blog. Tomamos a decisão e pretendemos respeitar as expectativas que podemos gerar nos nossos potenciais leitores. A princípio, vamos publicar três vezes por semana, nas segundas, quartas e sextas, tópicos sobre Business, Inglês, e Ensino/Aprendizado, respectivamente.

É isso! Bem vindos, esperamos com sinceridade que gostem e mandem sugestões, críticas para que essa iniciativa seja proveitosa para todos!

Luciano Lapa
Director of Studies